Is it ok to find your teen daughter hot?

Question

This is not me as I do not have any kids.My older friend is a very close friend of mine and tells me things that he would not tell other people. We went out foir some drinks a few weekends ago and we were laughing and joking and had a good time. I was like, "Who do you think is really hot?" and he is like, "Oh, my daughter, hands down".So I stop and look at him. First, I stop to assess how much we both had to drink. It wasn't much. Then he turns to me and says, "Hey man, you know I'm a family man and would never do anything with my kid. Its just like that joke we had when we were in high school. Someone has a hot sister and they say if she wasn't my sister I would hit it. Its like that. You have to admit, she is hot".So I have to admit, she is very very attractive for 17. Totally not my cup of tea as I date girls my own age and could not deal with the immaturity. Yet if we are talking purely on just how pretty she is, she can stop traffic.So I mean, He's a nice guy and I know he has nothing in his past where he was molested nor would I think he would do that. So lets not go in that direction with this question... PLEASE.This question is for a parent spouse... Would you be upset if you found out your husband found your daughter sexually attractive? Even if you knew but he never told you?This question is for the daughter... If you found out that your dad was sexually attracted to you yet you knew he would never say or do anything about it, how would you feel about it or handle it? Please indicate in your answer if you are a spouse or daughter, Thanks!

Quinten Schmeler · Accepted Answer

I am a spouse....I would be sickened if I found out my husband was sexually attracted to his own flesh and blood. That goes beyond normal in my book. I would be totally fine with him thinking his daughter was beautiful...what dad doesn't think that? but to be sexually attracted to that young of a girl on top of being his own daughter is wrong and disrespectful. I would be more upset if he kept it to himself only because that would tell me he doesn't think there is anything wrong with it. If he told me, I would assume he found it disturbing to him also, and wanted some advice.

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

Whoa! Okay Ill steer clear of what you want me to.My daughter is 7 so at this point, that pig would be loooong gone and not permitted to see her.Thinking of her as a teen, I would be horrified. Im not sure exactly how I would react. I suppose he should keep it to himself, sepcifically if he hasnt and dosnt plan on touching her. Thinking your 17yo daughter could stop traffic because she's gorgeous is not quite the same as having the hots for her or thinking about what it would be like to "be" with her. Gee, but, Im not a dad, so I dont know.When I was a teen, Im sure my dad thought I was a catch, but with boys my own age. he never tried anything on me nor told me I was hot or sexy, never! Id be disgusted if I found out now,though.

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

Very interesting. He could have allot of pride for having a pretty daughter, or he could be a pedophile. The fact that he said what you were thinking before you had a word out seems a bit strange. I would feel very uncomfortable if my dad (Which i do not have) were to say i am hot. It's not appropriate, especially what he said was not appropriate. I suggest that you talk to him more about it, and if he seems to have been doing things in his past or now that has to do with his daughter then take any action that seems necessary.

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

The bonding mechanism that keeps family members from being physically attracted to each other doesn't always work "full strength" or at all, for one reason or another, but most people don't understand that and take it for granted that anyone who could be turned on by a family member must be immoral or a "monster," but it's purely biology, not morality. Most mothers would probably be hysterical and throw the poor guy out even if he never had any intentions of making a move on the little heartbreaker. It's probably well that most spouses under those circumstances don't know about or appreciate the daily battles that their significant other endures keeping desires in check. This is especially true with step parents, where there is no natural bonding in the first place.In any case, acknowledging someone's physical beauty doesn't necessarily mean they're actually attracted to them. My stepson was at an award ceremony for his younger teenage sister and whispered to me, "My God, she is so beautiful!" and I knew he meant it in the purest way.

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

This Site Might Help You.RE:Is it ok to find your teen daughter hot?This is not me as I do not have any kids.My older friend is a very close friend of mine and tells me things that he would not tell other people. We went out foir some drinks a few weekends ago and we were laughing and joking and had a good time. I was like, "Who do you think is really...

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

My Daughter Is Hot

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

If I found out that my dad was sexually attracted to me, I would be scared! even if he's joking around it's still not cool. Now if he says "my daughter is good looking" then I would take it as a compliment from my dad. But if he's saying "She's hot! admit it" I would be SCARED. Usually if a dads friend says that his daughter was hot, he would get mad. But your friend is saying "Admit it"? Just tell him it's okay to think you have an attractive daughter all parents should think that, but saying that your daughter is hot hands down! that's weird

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

I am a "Shrink"- So many men displace their wife with their daughter. When this happens it due to the daughter wanting to compete with the dad for the wife's place in the home and the man's mid-life insecurity. Chances are the girl is undermining mom. These girls typically cling to calling the father "daddy" long after its appropriate( like 10 years old). Its a manipulation, this man is one step above kiddy porn- Get some counseling.Get the princess a job and quit looking.

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

I am a daughter ð I believe men (whether related to you or not) think that way. I don't think it's super weird, unless of course they act on it. He probably told you because you are his best friend. If he would tell other ppl, that would be weird. My dad tells me all the time that he thinks I'm beautiful, I don't take it the wrong way. Saying your daughter is hot is a little different, but you said you're close so....It's a fine line there.....As long as you don't think he would do anything, I wouldn't worry about it. Again, guys are made that way. Doesn't matter who it is, they are made that way. I would be more upset as the wife, with him talking about who is hot! ðEDIT: Okay ppl, "sexy" and "hot" are two different words. "Hot" means physically attractive nowadays. The man didn't say "sexy." That would be disgusting. But he didn't say that.

Quinten Schmeler · Answer

as a daughter i would feel insecure/awkward around my dad if he told me that he was aroused by me, this is different then saying that i'm beautiful which i think all dads should tell their daughters regularly but i would probably start locking my bedroom door everynight and wear more baggy clothes to bed, and maybe more often if i was going to be spending more time with him.I mean think about that in reverse. if the daughter thought that her dad was hot and 'wanted' him. that is just wrong. but it is different because she really doesn't have the power to 'do anything' against his will - but he does.

Bertram Bins IV

Is it ok to find your teen daughter hot?

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